I'm (gotta be) OK

I was a police who’s standing in the middle of the road controlling the traffic because the traffic light was off, near the junction which got stagnation, near the car crash at the other side of the road; and i am the only police who’s standing there. I was all confused about what to do first. To me, it’s all important. I was hoping that i have a cloning(s) that i can give them errands to. I wish i could divide myself, do self-separating , then still alive and can continue living just like amoeba. I wish i were a superhero who have a power to move here and there helping things out near me fast.

But i knew, i should stop thinking about my wishes.

The fact was, there’s only me right there and i got to handle all of them. I had to, for no matter what, cause i have this responsibility to do my duty. I realized that i couldn’t cling on to anybody thoroughly. It’s me there, it is really  me there. I gotta do it myself, gotta do what i gotta do.

Then i know; I am a human being, who have this brain to list stuffs that i gotta do, then give my body an errand to do it one by one. I have this both hands and foot who can be divided to do anything. I have a power too though, it’s quite much enough to help things out around me.

Every cloud has a silver lining

Hey people! You have no idea how many pictures of clouds i found. Haha that might be silly but those could make me feel peace somewhat. Lol. It ain’t bullshit. No kidding, i just love to see that. once i ever lowered my speed while i was riding motorcycle just to see cool cloud over the sky. And somewhat makes me think, ‘wow, i’m living on earth.’

nearly 2010 when i was having a journey to Central Java& Jogjakarta;

Yea we all live in this sucha wonderful world without knowing how God have given us this big awesome nature. Every moment we see any cool scenery that’s the moment when we gotta be grateful that we already given this beautiful chance to live on earth, to look upon that cool scenery, to live the life.

nearly 2011, around the house;

Once when i was in 11th grade, me and classmates looked upon the window surprise to see the cloud formed the shape of heart. Some of us capture it and thought it could be sign. Of love? Pffh not sure but yeah, our own feeling would work to find out what was beyond every kind of shape that cloud had formed. Haha. And when i was a kid, i had a dream to become a pilot or at least a skydiver. Since my home was pretty near from a place so called airport, i was always love to see those skydivers and i wanted to be part of it. Whatta kid. but until now, whenever i pass that region near my old house and see if there’re sky divers, i would love to stop for a sec and stare at them figuring out how if i was there diving over the sky with that parachute. Hahaha okay if i had chance to do that, i’d love to!

earlier these months:

As far as i know, staring upon the sky is one of cool thing to do on earth because it gives me sort of inspiration or spirit or faith or whatever it is that could tell me that i always have to wake up. I dont know, it’s like you got some messages from earth. Haha idk, figure it out then. And if you remember “Every cloud has a silver lining”, it does happen. We have that belief whenever we got every problem or anything that might hinder us from moving forward, there’s always be a way out. Those word give us some strength to walk through this tough moment; time to step to continue our study further. We gotta be sure that we’re gonna pass it all, that God always has a plan for us. Surely without leaving our effort and pray behind, we will get that! I ;) God is there right beside us :’’’) Put the rest to Almighty God.

a make-myself-feel-relief writing

I've been being something. Somewhat I feel like detached from world is gonna be interesting. or more like detached from cyber world. Like you have twitter, facebook (no longer touched atcually, but still often to take a look, click upon notifications and find there's just notifications for games then I'll just go close the tab), tumblr, even blogger, and everything else which you realize that having those things that lets you share anything doesn't make you feel any better from the heart break you're suffering. Actually not a real heart-break but it just heart-break-like when your heart feels sooo bad, like your mood is at the lowest point of earth and theres nothing that can boost them back to normal and seems like no one could understand. I've always wanted to tweet about how I actually feel but then I think that's not really important to tell and not cool to let anyone see how bad I've been up to yet I think about people's comment which might appear later in their minds. So I'll just be "better off left some stories untold". But then one question pops out, why wouldn't we just tell?

Okay if I happen to continue about questioning my self a WHY, that'd eat a week to discuss about it. Yea. I'm about to loose mind. Idk why. Tbh I am so scared of my own words, my own heart, my own mind. Idk how it could possibly happen to me recently. It's like my enemy is my own heart, my own mind. Somewhat I have to fight with it unwittingly. And I dunno which is stronger. Yet I have to find the answer. *ok continue* I'm scared of my own thought. That's the problem. Okay I'm afraid I've made this writing like a spinning route which has no end. like, keep talking repeatedly about the same thing. But the thing is.....*15 seconds to think* I don't know, I have no idea. Actually I got some words to tell, but I'm afraid to tell. Feels like there's a missing part of mine which makes me feel this random and scared. Oh Well... forget it. at least i feel a lil bit relief now after blabbering about that asdfghjkl stuff

Anyway, school is approaching. I might as well have to use these last 2days properly.....by...sleeping. Seriously I just found that sleeping is the most heaven-like thing in the world. I mean it gives me jolt of relief. Feels sooo good. My sleep time is now divided by 3 parts. First, 2- 5 or 6 pm then 1-5 am then 6- 9 or 10 am. And I know I'll never have this kind of chance later when school starts. So I think I've been using this chance properly. To take an extra rest. YEA. Have I told you that when I was a kid I think sleeping was just wasting time? now it's all flipped, I'm really proud of myself after spending my day to sleep and I thank God for this :)

by the way, HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE, CHEERSSSS! ;)

another blabs left behind

29 march. Man, you gotta be joking.

It was raining and there's two exams await. I was riding my motorcycle smoothly. With no obstacles. Peacefully. But then.......I felt smth happened to the wheel. Until I realize that the road gave me something. The handlebar suddenly getting undercontrol which had made me get total panic. But that's not the exact problem. The thing I got was, the tires was leak! I don't know where exactly I got the nail and I don't know why the hell that nail could choose me as a victim. The feeling I got the most was, PANIC and WORRIED if I would arrive late and couldn't have the exams. Luckily, right beside the road where I got my tires leak, there's a bengkel(shop for repairing vehicles). Thank god. Without any blabs, I asked the mechanic to fix the tires. When I was busy to get the raincoat off me, I got a brilliant idea! First, I called my dad about what happened to me and asked his permission to call the teacher who's working at noticing late students. My plan's working was, I was going to call that teacher and asked for permission of coming late because of this-road-sudden problem. And then yeap! They granted my permission for late coming. so now, just needed to wait for the mechanic to finish repairing the tires and then i could go to school not on fire. awesome, by the time i entered school knowing the gate already closed, i told the security man that i've phoned the teacher for late-coming permission and after that teacher asked my name if i was the student who just phoned, he let me enter the class; without any record of late or punishment thing. pfff loads of thanks to God who has given me ease at dealing with problem on the road and ease in doing exams J

FIZZLE

These guys we’re about to come here. Exactly on May, 14th. I have no idea if i have to buy the ticket. I eagerly wanted to! However, i got financial problem or whatever it called. Not good to be mentioned. I mean i have another importance that need loads of money. I’ve been adoring this band since i was on junior high school. First song i heard was, I Think About You Everyday. Its lyric was used for girls from boy. But i don’t know what made me that interested in hearing that song at the first time. Cool tones i guess. This song led me to know another songs from this band. And that’s how i started to dig information out of this band, until i got my playlist full with their songs. Baby We’re Invinsible also melted me away because of its lyric and tone. No particullar touching lyrics actually, but just hear it and you’d get the feeling of flying or whatever it is, which could make you stoked in hearing that songs. Deep meaning of lyrics. Go hear it dude!

I’ve ever posted things about this band, i’ve introduced it here. And now it happens that they’re gonna throw a concert here -the thing i’ve been waiting for- and it happens that i got the feeling to use my money to another thing and not for this. I feel like i’m in the middle of the journey, to the right where i could save my money for a rainy day or to the left where i’d meet these guys and lost my money. Need suggestion in hurry! Before the time hit me.

Ok i know this sucha chance to meet them whose voice been heard by me for every night. I’m not that big fangirl tho. I just want to meet them. I’ve been trying to come up with ‘it’s okay they’re not the most important thing to meet’ but it ends up with ‘OMG I WANT THEM I WANT TO SEE THEM LIKE CRAZY’. Ok exaggerating though. Okay gotta thing hardly which way i would take.

the thing i always wish it's mine

Problem? Yes

This might be small problem. But it’s been bothering meh. There’re some words i wanted to say, but why the hell is it always stuck out here on my throat and never come out out of my mouth?

World, tell me why

The Last Sunday Morning on March

Happy sunday humans!

This morning I had an awesome opening, something on cyber world greeting. Plus driving around and then doing sport (Y) my dad made me playing badminton. It's been long time tho I didn't meet shuttlecock. It's always great doing sport in sunday morning without thinking what's coming around tomorrow. Although I know tomorrow will always come. That means another busy weekday begin. It made meh think that 7days isn't quiet enough for student, like meh. Here I elaborate it; so 5days of week we spend at school. Plus one day for basketball practice at school on sadturday. At home I need to prepare for monday and another weekday, because there're ass-ignments and exams approaching. Besides I need some entertaining with friends either family. The matter is, if I spend my awesome weekend with fighting on my desk, How do I get some entertaining thing? Weekend supposed to be spent by hanging around somewhere not related with school. Although sunday evening must be at home and prepare for the following day, but at least I could spend the whole sat-afternoon til sunday afternoon without any thought bout school. If I were a person who doesn't really care about school, I would not be THIS care and THIS worried about the assignment or exam coming in. But it happens that I'm kind of care bout school, and I can't help myself if I got unwell-prepared things for school and got bad achieve. I gotta get achievement. well if i could just forget it, i would. one thing inside my mind why i still stand for this is, i wanna reach my dream. these all school things would be meant so much to me later, i know. we need to take this as special things because thank god you're there at school, having friends and teachers who always give you tasks, plus some sweet memories over there. this life wont be meant well if there's no school tasks.

PS: Thanks Dad for giving me some driving practice in this last 2 weeks :D

crap, eh?

March already.

First day of holiday. Home. Feel ease at home, just the way it is. Am i supossed to go somewhere else on earth today? I’ve figured it out. Yesterday i was thinking how i spend my holiday. No idea. Or if i have an idea, i’d go somewhere alone. I mean yeah just myself. and today just hanging around this kind of mess city, pamulang. My life today were; accompanying my brother to school and then home, having a super quick bike ride and then pick another brother up and then home home and home home. I aint sick of this condition, but i can barely survive myself if i would do this to the next 6 days. i ain't expert at riding motorcycle. I’d be throwing up everyday. I mean it. Im totally sick at riding motorcycle when i don’t need to. I’m supposed to be sleeping and doing something which isn’t related with motorcycle. I mean, can i get a chance not to riding motorcycle for a while? it's good that motorcycle able to accompany me to everywhere. Yeah motorcycle becoming one of important thing in my life now. but that doesn't mean i'm locked at 'i could ride it and involve that much to it'. the matter is, people give me errands to do accompanying-and-picking something up like that and i don't want it. i need a rest out of riding. You know im kind of worried my back would be getting sick of sitting on the motorcycle, and my hand sick of handling the handle bar. How would it be?

And about the plans i’ve made with my friends.....i think i’m getting sick of it really soon. I mean it’s all mess. i'm afraid it'll end up i can’t attend anything and gonna get stuck at home. Oh i really wish i could realize the plans. I need a glimpse of refresh air out of home and glimpse of entertaining thingy out there. I need some fun, that exactly what i’m talkin about.

you'd rather ignore this crap. lol 8)

Wimpy Me

found cool link and then wimp-ed my self. here's my character. idk why i choosed that cloth, and stuff, but i'm sure enough THIS look is cool. cool-like me

THIS WON'T BE FEBBUARY IF I DON'T POST THIS

Its 19 feb and now I'm sitting right underneath the full moon. I'm way speecless in describing this sky on this night. I'm figuring out how to capture this awesome view. Ew my digcam isn't working and I dnt have slr or smth. Ah how could I capture this cool view?!oh you really have to go here, to my house and see the greatness of this view. I feel like the moon shining my home much more than the other house. I'm turning off the front lamp on my house, and now I can see the brightest light at night.

23feb now. Je suis en retard. No way! Gosh! been trying so hard not to come late. Man you kidding me. Now new record, I got 2 times of late. Ew if I got 3, that means my parent will be called and......yeah you know. From now, I rly have to wake up earlier and and go to school at 5. 15. Oh no, breakfast haven't ready yet, so umm 5. 20. I really have tooooo! If I don't, I will be in so much trouble. Actually by the time I reached school finding the gate already closed, I overthink, how if I turn around and go home. goshhhh. Now I kinda regret not to do that thought. If I could've just turned around, I wouldn't have been in trouble like this.

5mins head off to 24 febuary 2011. Haven't slept any. After more than 12hours not even touch ANY of my bed, now I'm totally laying over here. I'm really tired. Sure. My head starting to explode or smth. I'm way too tired by that school stuff. Something really needs to help me to get rid of it. Just don't ask about how my task was. And what I got today are, je ne pas en retard, mais, I had to walk by my motorcycle to gas station because run out of gasoline when I went back home. so here i tell ya; suddenly after I got my motor couldn't run, I was extremelly shock. I kept saying, something must be kidding me. Oh please, I was in the middle of the way and don't ask me how i'm working to walk by my motorcycle to gas station because it's too cool yet pathetic. sarcasm again. HFFFFFT kinda embarassing tho; the only girl on earth who ride motorcycle and suddenly got run out of gasoline and had to walk by her motorcycle to gas station, ALONE and the more pathetic thing is, NOONE HELP ME. those ppl that i passed just looked at me and that's it, why didn't you just help me over here dood! kind of wondering why this ppl on earth isn't much friendly as i expected. oh what the world was thinking now. EW OKAY That's my first experience! pretty good tho. Why good, is just because I thank God I got that problem, because if I didn't, I would always postpond myself to buy gasoline.

February and such

FOUND MY WRITING ABOUT WHAT THE WORLD DONE TO ME ON THIS FEBRUARY

2nd febuary now. The laziest day of school. Because I'm too sleepy to go to school and tomorrow is imlek's itl holiday so, I'm gonna off from school. I have no idea what to do

I was sick at that day. This recent week actually. I felt like drowning. I got fever, unstoppable cough and etc. Many things to be repaired. And I really have to fix this condition. I can't even stand by these high temperature, this dizzy head, and this cough. Somehow I have to learn smth that God gave me this sick is, to remind me that I have to take care of my healthy. I waste my healthy too much. I was insisting myself that much til I fell to sick. Really, this week really challenge me. Thank God I have kind-hearted dad who always accompany me to school when I was sick. :')

Ew I got low battery here.

It's 14 feb now. People say it's valentines day. But not for me. Today is chemistry exam and that means exam week already started. That's all. Nothing special for today. I don't celebrate that v-day. But I have to remember that when I was in elementary school, and jhs, I got couple bars of chocolate on this v-day. Awesome huh. But those thing never come back since today. It shouldnt be back, isn't it? v-day is just a symbol of love and such. Nothing special, besides my belief teach me there's no v-day on earth, besides (again), I don't have someone special to be loved. Right now I'm about stressed out about this exam week, there still 4days left and 8subjects awaits. I shouldn't be this stress, but it's kind of hard to let my self not to be stressed. I assure myself I can do this! Hamasah! Ho ho hopefully I can through this succesfully. Fight! I um about to have quick nap right now and I'm planning to go to my lesson to study one hour from now on. And yeah tomorrow is time to take a quick breath of this exam week, because tmrw is DAY OFF FROM SCHOOL. Thank God there's chance for me to study yet resting. Let me be the firework on earth spreading the light and glimpse of flames which gonna jump to my dream and reaching achievement :p I'm kind of sick of my lil pony btw, hehe I haven't got haircut since last year :D ah yeah, talkin about exam week again, my target is I must get no remedial test and secondly, got first place.

It's 15feb already. It's raining outside and today I'm off from school. It's always cool everytime I hear the rain which fell upon the roof on midnight like this. Having slumber, laying down on my bed while typing this writing. Awesome. Suddenly I think about my dream that I really want to reach. Neversaynever. No quit.

15 feb in the morning. Cool. The weather just way too cool, plus grayish cloud, sounds there will be no sunlight today. Let's see. Zupakewl. I wish I could enjoy this sort of free time (off from school) more often :p. It's very nice to stay with this air but not with this exam week. So I'm sit over here, holding physics book while enjoying the weather. Dood it's pretty. Afternoon, about 3pm and I'm still studying biology, just started actually. I did physics exercise since mornin'. Now I'm doing some stretching session with biology, preparing for main studying session tonight. Wish me luck dood.

16feb now. Laying on bed while enjoying sucha cool weather (it's always cool) like this is nice yet perfect. It's raining outside (again) and I already got home at about 1pm. Phew. I wonder if I could do this activity everytime. Unfortunately It won't happen unless on exam week. I just passed biology and french today. Aw I really wish best result from my effort. Been strugling, just waitin for the result. Give me the best score, God

By the way if you want to know about my feeling during I studied biology, here I tell ya. It was so funny. I don't know what makes it funny but, you know, I'm so excited to face biology exam! Because I think I'm good enough in memorizing about that disgestive chapter. BUT that's not guarantee for me to do exam fluently. It wasn't as exciting as I studied. I did the exam well, yet pathetic. Kind of confused because of its phrase or smth. I didn't get the meaning at some sentences. Somehow trapping yet makes-us-choose-wrong-options. I was trapped in some numbers aaaoh. I think I was right,yeah ppl always think they're the rightest person on earth in answering exam question. BUT after I checked it with ma amis.....I was totally wrong. I got several numbers wrong.

Now I'm gonna sleeb and my plan is, spending ma time with history and english after I wake up. And humm, if there's still spare time, I promise I will go with physics.

Aaaa! don't tell me something ridiculous if......it's been 2am in the mornin and it's already 17th days of febuary. Phew I'm too excited in doing exercise question. I really hope that I can do question as excited as I did couple mins ago. Ew okay I think I should really have to hit the bed. Ho-ho-hopefully my storage memory doesn't go wrong in memorizing history subject for today, and english clause and such. Btw I haven't touched any cyber world since yesterday. I always got disconnection! My internet isn't working! By the time I wanted to look for translation of french on google, I pulled up some wires to make internet connection working and I didn't know if I pulled one of important wire 'til makes telephone not working. Phew me. The facts is, I made the internet connection not working and telephone connection broken. K ttyl bye zleep dood!

Errr. World really have to know about what I've done today. I got gloomy on doing physics exam today. Aaaaa a wanna scream out effin lot. O m g. It's really burn me down. Omagashhhh I've studied that much but......but I STILL COULDNT make it. I aint make it best :///// I think I will get 6 :'/ omagah it's so gloomy exam ever, yet pathetic. Goodness. I should really have to studyyyy waaay moooore harder. Theory isn't really needed. And also, if I could have slept much, I wouldn't have done it badly. Phewww-ing.

Random things 3

I JUST WANT TO SHARE WHAT I'VE GOT IN THESE FIRST COUPLE OF DAYS IN 2011. I WROTE ABOUT WHAT THIS WORLD WERE UP TO ON MY 'QUICK WORD' ON MOBILE. THIS TEXT CONTAINS RANDOM, SILLY & UNIMPORTANT THINGS :P

Back now 12th jan

It's 1:30 am now. I used to sleep now. Hff yeah I just finished math homework and my head just like smashes by all the polinomial formula and stuff haha yeah whatever it is, quiet funny tho.

OOPS! Wait up! it's 1:30am? So it must be 13th january!and today's nabila's bday. Ow. My briend since elementary school. Aw miss you gal.

(wide awake, morning)

By the way

i'm about being messed up by this morning rain, and pathetic school rules. Man. This late thing isn't my fault at all. C. These condition really DRIVING ME CRAZY. not-understandable teachers, teacher won't even understand how my condition is. How the situation is. Asdfghjkl why are people getting like THIS PATHETIC! C’mon. There's smth that u don't know, teacher. You don't know the blind side!

When I was on my way to school, I was wondering how the teacher's thought was. Were they gonna feel mercy to all student because of it's raining so badly and will give us dispensation to enter class OR they're gonna feel happy because there will be LOT OF STUDENTS WHO CAME LATE?

Suck of this pathetic school rules. I might be one of unlucky girl on earth today, because it's raining so heavily at my home, but when i arrived at school, there's NOT even raining, so that's why the school didn't give dispensation, i guess. but if the school look at 'the blind sides',there will be dispensation

I think she's happy now seeing more than 10 students came late, it's her job to notice this and give us punishment or write our names on the book for student who's not obeying the rules.

I'm not obeying the rules to come at 6:30

But that's because of something asdfghjkl happen at my home and badly heavy morning rain and sucking traffic jam and common little flooding and this mess city which just let the traffic light not working and let the police hiding somewhere out there and citizen are getting stressed out by this. You really kidding me. I cried right on the traffic light thinking of this pathetic condition. I have home like thousand miles far away from school and I have no one to accompany me to school so I have to ride motorcycle by myself. PFFFF!..................................

(after chill myself out)

But everything has a silver lining. Every single thing, there must be a gift. There must be smthng to be learnt by this tragedies. Every single problem always have a lesson to be learnt. And the lesson is, I have a chance to write about this at library. Right now. I have to wait in the library til my name's called by the teacher and bla bla bla

(sick of writing about that things).

and about asdfjkl thing on my home. Okay let me elaborate it.

Last night I did my homework, and it spent so much time, til about 2am. Since I lost my sleep time that much, I woke up lately. And after I step out from my bathroom, the problem began.

There's no white skirt, which I have to wear today, and I have to iron it by myself. 2nd, I want to have breakfast, but the time surely wasn't enough, so I just put the rice on my lunch box. 3rd it's raining so heavily and dad should've accompanied us but he said that he couldn't and then mom asked him to accompany us but dad STILL say, 'just go through the rain'. OMyGoodness really kidding me. We waited for ur help dad. Daddd really kidding me. I was getting upset, I did everything rushing. Kaboom. I got my motorcycle and wear my raincoat and yeah, went to school with tears upon my face.

14 jan

I'm about to wait my mom at her office. I was so freakin' sleepy when I rode motorcycle to go home. Really, starting from the very first minute I woke up this morning, my very first thought's saying is, I WANT TO WRAP MYSELF WITH THE BLANKET AND SLEEB TIL DROP.

Ew but my thought won't ever happen, so SCHOOL MUST GO ON. It's okay, because it's THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!

And at school I could barely open my tired eyes. Hfff. I wrote some notes with closed eyes, I wrote it unconsciously. Really, I need my bed. Til the last few second I left school, I just came out from liblary. Then, I went back home with this tired eyes again. Quiet dangerous tho, I rode motorcycle unconsciously. Til I decided to stop by at my mom's office to have a quick nap, but what I got is nothing unless some money to have lunch from mom :3 aoh thanks mom, now I'm writing this notes and have nowhere to go. I want to go to lesson actally, but I think it's

(i got low battery)

13

I’m about to cry now

RANDOM THINGS 2

hellopeople.

now already 2011, and this random post gonna be my first posting. okay since we're in the very beginning in this year, i wanna say HAPPY NEW YEAR, WELCOME 2011.

For this year, i wanna be a more better person. there's nothing special about my wish-list, but realizing it is my goal. talking about goal, this year i wanna save up more much money. won't spend it to unnecessary thing, i don't think i could have much money as i expected tho, but yeah let's see about my effort to save for rainy days. and about school thing, been busy enough about this first week of school. tasks already started, like things already started spinning and ruining over my head. a very much rest time is really needed. i'm way restless, because of common thing, sleep late night but wake up very earlier. lot things different after school started; i couldn't have my insomnia time, i rarely see this cool cyber world, less time to play guitar, less time to spend my time in front of this monitor, and the most make a difference is, i lost my much-rest time. those things shouldn't have changed that much actually. and about myself, i got several things to think about now. it seems like, i haven't found the-real-me. yeah i'm not that brave person, i guess that's the problem. i don't have that big bravery til this second. i don't know what brings me to write about this privacy, but really, i just want to write. this must be things that everyone shouldn't have known, but is it okay if i just want to share here, init? this just sucha crap huh? so many craps about things happened to me. whatta world. we never know what's coming up next.

Bike Ride

In these last week, i just had a mornin'-bike-ride to bsd, pamulang, or somewhere not faraway from my house. i started this routine since this holiday. Quick recap for that ;

1st time in this holiday. Sunday. Whenever the date. I had a morning bike ride with my mom. Heading to market; pasar modern bsd, and we took quick-break at there by eating some traditional cookies. And i suggested my mom to ride through teras kota (farther way to get home) and the result is kinda got stray-way. kinda tiring, we got 3hours out of house by having a bike ride. And i thought that’s gonna emit more sweat, but eventually i aint sweaten as much as i thought but got backache.

2nd time. Monday. This time with my brother. Moving faster than yesterday.

3rd time. Tuesday. I forgot what happened in Tuesday.

4th time. Thursday. With my brother. we met another bikers. And look at their equipment, so damn cool like they’re going to face bike competition.......while me and my brother only have simple-but-okay-tho bike, no helmet, no bike-suit-like-that, no bike-shoes-like-that, not that complete. It’s okay, we’re still cool tho.

5th time. Friday. With my mom again, this time headed to another market, pasar tradisional pamulang. And ew i thought my mom gonna buy some vegetables or smth, but infact, she bought lot lot food stuffs and me; hey mom do you forget we only bring two bikes here?it aint capable enough to bring those stuffs.

6th time. Saturday. Back with my brother again, i only took a simple route, because i was tired of pedaling the bike and i was sick of my backache and sick of taking uphill way. Dad asked to buy him chicken poridge, yep we stopped by at chicken poridge court and we also got breakfast at there. Heaven. and err guess what i got that day? right before i reached home, i saw a cute guy.............okay that's....that's zxcvbnm. but really! he just looked like someone. He also rode a bike, headed to different way, he just passed me by. Aoh. I felt like i have to turn around and pretending i go to the same way that he took.

And that’s the last day i rode a bike, i havent touched my bike til this second. Since there’s nobody gonna accompany me to have a bike ride again and since this backache getting worse, i’m off from bike.

Basketball shoes and something

now i have no idea. tomorrow i'll face a basketball tournament,and my basketball shoes is broken. and i haven't buy the new one because i consider my money for another things. and i haven't repaired that shoes. and the point is, i have no idea what should i wear for tomorrow. should i even wear no shoes for tomorrow's tournament?

this is pathetic.

and the other thing is, about math subject for tomorrow, i still don't get enough score for this semester. and the teacher keep giving the students the exam 'til the score good enough. there's actually something wrong with the way she taught us. it's like, driving our fear come up, and...frightening. but the fact is, she isn't the way it is. beyond her way teaching us, there's a pure kindness from herself. her humor sense also could make the student stay for 4hours per week on math subject. although some of us were afraid and dislike her. you know, hating the teacher isn't solving problem, it will gonna make worse situation instead. yeah.

the more you hate your teacher, the more fear you had and the more bad things will appear.

also another thing spinning over my head is, the bahasa task. i'm like chased by the deadline for collapsing that project in the D-day. yep, bahasa indonesia project and stuff. i have no idea

and don't talk about it in here.

about sending and giving a gift for my friend. i have no enough money to buy it. aoh healp.

enough. i shouldn't have said anything after period

FIGHT FOR EXAMS

Efforts will tell.

random, again

TODAY. i got a day full with MATH! funny though, but then, freakinly made me crazy. i can't figure out how to solve about trigonometric problem with high level difficulty...mm-hm. i have to be creative to find a way to solve this problem, because for the identity of trigonometric really needs ur creativity to get the answer. you have to use one formula, but then you can use another formula, if you still can't find it, you gotta change it with another formula, and so on. so you have to be creative which way will you gonna take. ah yeah whatever.

by the way. there's not only one way to reach something. there might be another good way, or even worse. but the point is, you can reach something that you really wanted to reach. yeah. that's what i got right now. i really want to reach my dream. i'd never forget my promises to do that. wish me luck for pursuing my great dreams, pals.

well, i (still) have no hell idea about *something i can't tell here*. something that really ruining my mind everytime i meet him.

~!@#$%^&*()

*PS you'd better not to read this post, because it's completely unimportant and........randomly silly

i just don't know what kind of feeling is this. random. boredom. undescribable feeling. i'm in the middle of the way between happy and sad. i'm happy outside, but sad inside. im pretending that im okay, but actually, there's something weird on my mind and you can say that, im not okay. i have no idea what to do about this situation, which i really need to tell anybody about this problem, but then, i think i shouldn't let anybody know about this silly problem. it's kinda complicated. this feeling driving me crazy. im dwowning, you know pals :'''''( right by this time, by this second, i just fell into strange feeling. it does really hurt. i dont know what to do. i just dont know it.i dont know.

Thanks

Finally, free from hesitation, Thank God.

Wish another best way for me:)