Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Last Day in October

I am right at the moment where i just jumped upon high rope on a game. It wasn’t so easy cause it took time and effort to finally have the bravery to jump. I was hesitating at the first time whether or not I continue to move forward. My enemy inside my heart kept telling I need to go back instead. I fought for my bad thought so hard.

The point is I can never lose from my bad thoughts. Yeah, I am the one whose thoughts filled with the bad thoughts which isn’t  healthy for my mind, body and soul, I know. I tryna reduce it then. It makes me remember someone who said, "don’t make it to be complicated, don’t yell cause it wont end up something good". Completely agreed with the one whose words keep spinning around my head.

Outside The Box


Being at outside the box has never been a good idea to me. 
I walk in unfamiliar surrounding. 
It seems easier if i stay inside the box. 

Twas what i thought at the first place.

North Serpong
Sept 28th 2017

Thursday, May 25, 2017

Just a mere opinion

I just wanted to tell the opinion about a guy in general.
.
I did mind myself if I ever think about a guy too much.
.
.
If people would say how hard it would be if you were woman.
But to me it’s even harder if you are a guy.
You have to be like, in my opinion, be the wisest creature on earth where you can't and wont hurt any woman feeling in the world. You gotta promise that.
That must have been hard to keep.
Cause guys used to share fake promises or other foolish words to any girl. Right huh?
.
That’s just my opinion came cross my mind.

Friday, May 12, 2017

A knife

One day I got an errand to peel off some fruits.

I immediately dragged my ass to the chair, grabbed a knife then began to peel it. As a human whose mom always got her daughter a peeled off fruit already at house, I was completely stiff in controlling the knife I held. It took days until I able to taste it. Plus, I didn't make such straight pathway of fruit rind when I peeled it off, until that time.
I found 'nother knife.
The smaller, thinner and surely it's a perfect sharp knife. Then I managed to peel the fruit better with it. I didn't cut the fruit excessively so more body of fruits were able to be eaten. I peeled it faster.

Then I think, how good it's like to be a sharper knife. Just a simple knife that able to do much, to give more, to handle great things without taking too long time to finish. I believe sharper knife has a long way to finally became what he is now.

Tangerang
12 Mei 2017

Thursday, May 11, 2017

Something that pictures me in the future



Here comes that day where I got several agendas in one time. Then I decided to arrive earlier to second appointment so that I could leave earlier to the next place.

The thing about coming earlier did give me something. It was family gathering at my cousin's. Each family use to bring some foods, if I arrive together with my family. Since I came earlier alone, I supposed to bring some foods, surely with my own decent money and with my own ideas. That's the moment where I know I will get used to be like this, if I come with my future family.
Since I came earlier, unlike usual, I was the one who's gonna be catched up with such what's up conversation. Or more than that, involved in gathering preparation, like core preparation.

Never had I thought to be such mature human being before. Especially the part when my cousin, the oldest child in her family -which pretty much describe me too-, led what's the gathering supposed to be like.

Until then I realize those were something that prolly picture me in the future. The future when I come to the gathering with my own family.


Tangerang
11 Mei 2017

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Perks of being a leader?




When you got no one to defend yourself but yourself
Everyone would point at you of what you're saying
Some people got it wrong
That's the moment where i need to collect my piece of courage into one fine action
The moment where listening more is the only one thing you have to ensure yourself to do
That time when you need to calm everybody down without showing you're freaking out
The moment where you have to convince anyone, even to yourself


Tangerang

Saturday, April 22, 2017

A little forgiveness




A little forgiveness is needed for those who got stiff heart.
The stubborn people would find it hard to know that they did mistakes and hard to apologize.

And yes, as a nice and warm human being it's not wrong to succumb.
We're mature enough succumbing for anyone whose heart possibly less sensitive than us. I know it's hard to give in but it's for the sake of our community around. You know, this newly born companionship that we've been seeking for in such a long time turned to soothe my soul at its finest which I won't let any of this brotherhood bond apart.

May this heart always have room to forgive and forgiven. Cause that's basically what make this mind stay in sanity without having negative vibe attached.

Tangerang
22 April 2017