Saturday, December 3, 2011

WHOA

Whoa its December now.

I’ve been facing bunch of exams. You know, 12 grader. It’s getting more hectic, you know, daily exam, weekly exam, monthly, 3-month exam, semester exam. School ends at 3 or 4 pm and then going to additional course until 7 or 8 pm, arrive at home. Having dinner, sleeping. Wake up again in the morning, and start the cycle again. Whoa. Home is now for a place to sleep and have dinner. Tired. Yes. But, it gets me another thing to learn which im about to step to further journey, and before i step on it, i gotta reach the requirement to step on it. To step to university. And it needs sacrifaction. Getting further, i realize that i gotta stay my mind away from unimportant thing, i gotta leave it for a while. At least after this fighting is over. After i get what i want to get. Everyone hopes it’ll worth the effort. So do I. After December is over. Here we go, the real war begins. For real, it’ll be more hectic. But i dont want to scare myself first, i believe this is gonna be over soon.

I can barely enjoy my spare time and feel how time flies smoothly, because all i feel is time is running fast like really fast toward me, and to everyone who got the same feeling as me. I mean look, i feel yesterday was July or August but now is December and about to turn to 2012. Many things i’ve had, in good way or worst, in happiness or sadness, in bitter or sweet way which turn me upside and down, and that gives me something. About the thing which give me a lot of happiness or sadness, about the L word which have pissed me off or even made me messed up, about the low score i got, the best one, and everything. Many things i wanna share here! Haha! Overall, I’d like to tell the conclusion, which is, “experience is best teacher”. I’ve had couple of sweet experiences, and the bitter one also, and those give me um... a thing. Something i can’t tell by words. And the oh-god-i-feel-so-lonely thing actually not true. You are actually not alone when you feel alone. It happens because you just not looking around, when you look around, keep your head up, then you’ll find the solutions. Come from friends, parents, God, even from yourself. When i think i got no where to run, i have God as a place to share, to cry about the bad thing i had, to ask to grant my wish. Friends also, they’re amazing! I can’t picture myself one or two year later after we go to the different university. How would it be? Saying good bye is the hard part, might be. But that doesn’t mean good bye is the end of everything. Oh god, i really can’t picure myself not going to that lovely senior high school again, meeting all friends, class-mates, chair-mates, teachers, everyone. But wait, im not gonna leave that school before i get the requirement right? The journey is still far, look, there’s still January, Febby, March, April and it’s gonna be end at June, or April might be, if it’s going faster. And. I have an aim to make a sweet ending at that school, a sweet ending of high school story. I really need a support to face all this. This is not a world war actually, but i need a support to fight to reach achievement, go get what i want, make my parent happy.

God knows what best for me, for us.